Love is Love is Love!

“Love is love is love.” It makes me so happy to see folks show their support during Pride month by offering this phrase. When I notice friends who are allies post “love is love is love” on their social media feed, I know they’re going out of their way to share that they view all love stories as equal and worthy of celebration. As a queer woman, I truly do believe that love is love is love. And, at the same time, I know there are specific questions and considerations members of the LGBTQIA+ community must consider when planning a wedding. I am thrilled to be a part of ElopeRVA, an organization that is here to consider all of these questions with couples and help them plan a wedding that perfectly reflects who they are, both as individuals and together.

For most of recorded history, marriage was a ritual only available to straight couples, and often our language at weddings reflects this. There are assumptions that there will be a “bride” and a “groom” and most traditional wedding ceremonies use phrases such as “man and wife.” At ElopeRVA, we are committed to being creative and to crafting custom ceremonies that reflect the beauty, boldness, and bravery of ALL partnerships. When you choose us to officiate your wedding we will meet with you, get a true sense of who you are, and write a wedding ceremony from scratch that authentically celebrates you and your partner. Whether you are “partners,” “spouses,” “husbands,” “wives” or “husband and wife,” we are here for it and we are here for you!

ElopeRVA was created because we saw a need for officiants who truly understand how to celebrate ALL couples and craft ceremonies that reflect the diverse beauty of ALL marriages. This Pride month as we celebrate marriage equality, we also want to take a moment and celebrate the distinctive beauty and creativity central to LGBTQIA+ marriages. Love is love is love and LGBTQIA+ love is unique and sacred and we are here to celebrate it with you.

Jamie Lynn is a chaplain for spiritual but not religious students at a local college. She loves trying new recipes, good music, whisky, hiking and relaxed nights in her backyard with friends. A member of the queer community, she believes that love is love is love and is ready to celebrate you and your partner.

She is ordained in a progressive Christian tradition and has officiated countless weddings over the past ten years. She also offers premarital counseling and is ready to work with you to plan a perfect, custom ceremony.

Premarital Counseling with ElopeRVA

The months before a wedding can be stressful, exciting, and filled with so much to do. There are often invitations to send, receptions to plan, and a ceremony to coordinate. With everything planning a wedding entails, it can be easy to forget about the one thing that truly matters: you, your partner, and the relationship you’re continuing to build together.

ElopeRVA wants to help you do it all! We want to be there to assist you in planning the perfect wedding and we also want to help you take care of your relationship and one another.  As we work to better support you, we are thrilled to announce a new premarital counseling service, available only to ElopeRVA clients. Research published in the Journal of Family Psychology demonstrated that couples who opted for premarital counseling reported higher levels of marital satisfaction and experienced a 30 percent decline in the likelihood of divorce over five years.

What is premarital counseling?

Premarital counseling invites you and your partner to better prepare for marriage. It involves setting time aside for meaningful conversations about “big topics” that are mediated by a trained facilitator with experience in premarital counseling.  Rev. Jamie Lynn Haskins is an ordained Chaplain and certified premarital counseling provider and is excited to offer this opportunity to our clients.

Rev. Jamie Lynn Haskins ; photo by Heather Frable

Why choose premarital counseling with ElopeRVA?

Our premarital counseling is research-based and customized to meet your needs. Each couple will take an assessment separately that points to strengths as well as possible growth areas for both individuals and for the relationship. Following the assessment, Jamie Lynn will provide custom resources and lead you in conversation that helps you go deeper as a couple and come to a clearer understanding of what you both want and need.

 What should we expect at our first session?

Premarital counseling involves four 60-minute sessions. During your first session, you will be provided with the results of your assessment as well as resources tailored to your needs as a couple. In conversation with Jamie Lynn, you will create a counseling plan and decide what you’d like to address in your time together. After designing your plan, you will jump right into conversation about what matters most—who you are as individuals and who you are together!

What will we discuss in premarital counseling? 

Counseling is tailored to each couple and your needs. Common topics can include: relationship dynamics (including strength and growth areas); communication, conflict resolution, couple dynamics as they relate to family-of-origin dynamics; financial management, relationship roles; sex and affection; children and parenting, and spiritual beliefs.

If you are interested in premarital counseling with ElopeRVA please fill out our contact form so that we can set up a time to talk. We would love to be apart of your day and help you take care of your relationship and one another.

A special thank you in honor of marriage equality

I started ElopeRVA after seeing a need for an elopement service in Richmond that put all love, especially LGBTQ+ love, at the forefront of its mission. It’s important to me that all love is celebrated equally every day, which is why I work to create safe and inclusive environments for all couples who want to get married.  

Two beautiful couples, who I also have the honor of calling my friends, helped me realize my passion for celebrating marriage equality. Both couples needed an officiant who believed in their love and could provide them with an experience tailored to their story. I sincerely thank them for allowing me to be a part of their special day and for being my first clients.

 Kriyyah and Rana 

I became friends with Rana while we were studying abroad in Paris, France. We quickly became close friends after spending one of our first nights at a small cafe drinking wine and talking into the wee hours of the night. 

Rana met her wife Kriyyah shortly after I met my husband and we have all developed a close bond. I was honored when Rana and Kriyyah decided to tie the knot and wanted me to officiate their wedding during Pride month last year in DC. As Pride celebrations took over the city, the couple exchanged vows in a beautiful rose garden surrounded by close friends and their adorable pups.

Yamila and Janelle 

I met Janelle a week before she met Yamila and they fell fast into a whirlwind romance. The two first met on a flight and not long after Janelle and I were excitedly planning an intimate airport elopement. Janelle and Yami said I do in an intimate ceremony at Richmond International Airport with just the three of us. A year later, we took off to a gorgeous chateau in France where I had the honor of marrying them in front of close family and friends.

I’m so grateful to my friends for helping me realize my passion for ushering couples into their next big step in life. Their marriages have been an important catalyst in allowing me to demonstrate the importance of all love being visible not just during the month of Pride but all year round. 

Love is love at ElopeRVA and we’re here to serve all couples! Contact us to learn how we can make your big day truly special. 

Why elope? Five reasons why eloping might be perfect for you

More and more, couples are forgoing traditional weddings and choosing to elope. When my husband and I eloped in 2018, we faced many challenges as an interfaith couple. Having two weddings was out of the question and after being together for six years, we wanted to get on with spending the rest of our lives together. 

Eloping allowed us the freedom to get married our way and we have absolutely no regrets. 

Whether you’re facing the same challenges that my husband and I did or you’re simply weighing all of your options, here are my top five reasons why eloping might be perfect for you and your partner. 

1. You want to save money and time

The average cost of a U.S. wedding is nearly $40,000, according to WeddingWire’s 2019 Newlywed report. You don’t have to shell out tens of thousands of dollars to have a dream wedding. At ElopeRVA, we can help you put together a ceremony fit with everything from custom flower arrangements to high-quality photography that won’t drain your savings account. 

While you’re saving money, you’ll also be saving time. Planning a traditional wedding requires months of hassle and hard work. You’re looking at 13-18 months of planning for a traditional wedding. On the other hand, ElopeRVA can have you ready to say “I do” in a matter of weeks or even a few days for more spontaneous couples. 

2. You’re in an interfaith relationship 

Planning two separate weddings isn’t feasible for everyone and not all interfaith couples have the support of their families. Eloping is a great way for you and your partner to meet in the middle and create the ceremony that works best for the both of you. The opinions of others won’t be a distraction. As I stated before, eloping is about enjoying the freedom to get married your way. 

3. You want adventure 

Not having to worry about accommodating 100+ guests opens up your ability to get married wherever you want. You could jetset to the destination of your dreams, exchange vows and enjoy a blissful honeymoon right after. Eloping is perfect for couples that really want to get creative without breaking the bank or dealing with a lot of stress. 

4. You want to focus on intimacy 

Eloping allows you to strip away the pressure and anxiety that often comes with traditional weddings. You and your partner can focus on and celebrate each other in an uninhibited way. It’s incredibly hard to focus solely on your partner when you’re playing host to a large wedding. However, when you elope, your dream wedding can come to life without anyone or anything getting in the way of your most intimate moments. 

5. You don’t actually like being the center of attention 

If you cringe just thinking about exchanging your vows in front of a large audience, eloping is definitely a great option for you. Not everyone likes being the center of attention especially when they’re expressing their deepest feelings for their significant other. Social anxiety doesn’t have to disrupt your wedding day. Eloping creates a safe space for you to be completely vulnerable without watering down your thoughts or emotions. 

Eloping opens up a world of opportunities for couples to commit their lives to one another in a way that fits who they are and what they want. If this sounds like the right step for you, learn about the services ElopeRVA offers and get in touch so we can start helping you bring your special day to life.